January 24, 2012
My cooperating teacher was sick today but came in for two hours in the morning to meet with me. We went over her plans for me for the day. I shared my lesson with her regarding the flag lesson and she was able to observe me. I made a breakthrough with Omar today that was the highlight of my day. He knows several words in English but doesn't know how to write very well. In my lesson I had them match the various countries with their corresponding flags. Once they were matched they had to draw them and write the countries and colors of the flags down. Omar was struggling with the writing part so at first I helped him spell out the letters, but then I took out a piece of paper and colored a line with green and wrote the word green next to it along with all the other colors they were using. I asked him if he understood and he said, "I got it Mrs." I tried to help further and he said he had it and smiled. At the end of the day I stayed late to get my binder organized and Omar walked by the room and waved to me. I came out in the hallway and asked if he was heading home and told him to have a nice night. He said, "You too Mrs." I really love this kid.
My cooperating teacher gave me some feedback from the lesson and said it was a good lesson but that I need to get their attention more and have them look at me when I present. This class is good so it's not really an issue but she just said for other classes that aren't so good I need to be more in charge. Also I cut out a lot of shapes for my kindergarten lesson which took hours but my cooperating teacher didn't want me to use them and wanted the kids to cut the stencils even though they didn't seem to understand that so that was somewhat disappointing. It feels like all my lessons so far are being criticized much more than encouraged but I guess I am learning and will just take it all with a grain of salt.
I observed most of the other classes today and was amazed by the 6th grade class. The sub and I tried to get them to be quiet. There are over 30 of them and they always have to do book work. They were walking outside and refusing to go in the room or do anything, then a TA came into the room and demanded their attention and stayed the rest of the class and they shut up as soon as she spoke. It was nice to see someone get their respect like that. I was amazed.
The 8th grade class last period had an assignment today that half of them refused to do. The same troublemaking kids were saying words like: fuck, retarded, and of course they couldn't go a day without talking about homosexuality. My wife told me with the one kid I should make a big deal about how he feels the need to talk about it all the time and that I should say since he's so interested in the topic maybe I should get the attention of the class so he can talk to them and share the topic that he's so interested in. I kind of tried that today but so far whatever I've tried hasn't really been working with him in particular. He's just resistant to everything. Any type of art that isn't drawing that he likes, anything that is different. Oh the whole conversation started because he said nigga. I told him not to say that in class and he debated with me whether he said nigger or nigga as if there is a difference and tried to get his friends to back that saying nigga in school is appropriate.
When I was talking to him about the drawing he said he wasn't going to do it and that he didn't like to draw anything other than regular drawing and this wasn't regular drawing and kept saying he couldn't do it. He said he likes to just sit at home and be on the computer. The boy next to him said yeah and talk to your boyfriend. This comment was said three times. I said so what if he's gay there's nothing wrong with it. He got up and was like I'm not gay ewe. (14) So that is the forth comment of the day. Then the boys went back and forth and one called the other a fruit cup three times (17). Then one said you are beyond gay (18). Then the other said he turns himself into a girl sometimes (19). Then he said back you're gay for even thinking that (20). Then the boy said twice I'm not gay (21-22). Then I don't like that stuff (23). Then one boy said I don't like that stuff (24). I don't like queers (25).
After hearing these comments so much I eventually just told them I'm gay. The one boy said that's okay because you're a girl. If you were a dude that would be a totally different story(26) Then he looked at me and said are you a man? (27) I said no, I'm a woman. I started writing notes down of everything they said and once I started writing things down the one boy who I genuinely do like asked if he could have his name taken off the paper. He asked if it was on it. I didn't give him an answer. I got the classes attention and said something about all the remarks I've been hearing in the class. I told them that I'm going to discuss it more a little later but asked if we needed to then. I told the group of boys who are always a problem that I made a movie about the topic and how men get murdered all the time for being gay. The boys sitting next to that table were impressed. They said you made a movie? I told them it was on netflix. One of them asked if they could see it tomorrow and were excited about it. I think 90% of the class would get something really positive from it if I did discuss fagbug in the class. The one boy said he wouldn't watch it. He also says he won't do a lot of things that are basic things the class asks of him. Then at some point somehow it came up one of the students asked if I was married to a man and I said no I'm married to a woman. I think the boys that heard that were shocked and interested at the same time. The other two boys I took into the hall and tried to talk to them privately. I told them that the language they were using was hurtful, but they really didn't seem to get it. Perhaps if I present fagbug to them I might get their attention in a different way. It's really the only class I see it as a problem where they clearly need some educating on the subject. Perhaps I can present on the topic but also think of a lesson that can go along with the presentation so it can be more than a one day lesson.
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